mean little BRAT

"Pip pip tally ho what what".
Go ON away with ye, and FECK OFF, ye. little. shite.
Just because 'daddy' is in the feckin r.a.f. doesn't mean you can tinker with the little lads from the garden and 'try the chaps ouyt' in yer fiendish contraptions.
YOU LiTTLE PONCE.

never say 'neat'

People who've been around for a while don't like people who say
'So I'm new here, it's fun so far'.
Samson was new, and he was 'cruising' for one of those 'bruising's that there have been so much talk about lately.
plural.
Tim wasn't so new, and he DIDN'T like turtles, he was just baiting Samson into commenting on that hue toob video.
There WiLL be trouble. As soon as they get off work, there WiLL be trouble.

scuffle of mythical proportions

Kevos was just minding his own beans wax in the park, just walking Cathros. When next thing he knows they're set upon by Donald of Hades with his two headed Duckhornodon. Ruckus was achieved almost immediately.

puppy ho !

Jeremy and Terry go into battle. Terry laughing to hide his fear, but the Mighty Jeremy was always ready to brawl ....

last, but getting the most attention

He wasn't fast. He never came first, but at least he did it nude. That has to count for something. Does it ? Doesn't it ? Does it ?

In other, and lighter News ....

The Fargleston Flingers won first prize in the Fargleston all county 'fella flinging' competition that took place this past Saturday!
Charley (37), their befreckled handler, said that she was 'Over the moon' with the result and that 'The boys have worked very hard learning their routine and it's paid off.'
The lads themselves commented that they would be glad to share their winnings with the three 'torch juggling' victims from our earlier report. Isn't that nice.
Mmm.
Nice.

highlander torch-ers gang !

Late yesterday evening a man was arrested on charges of torching and 'playing with' some small time mischiefists.
"He was dressed like a girl" said one aye witness.
The small men later admitted that they had been wiping eggs on the man's garage door 'As a jape, like' when they were captured and set upon by the large 'Crustie'.

tortured by giant old man !

Is it ? Is that what's going on ? Well, That's what 'big Tomm' was arrested for, torturing little men.
Actually, he was just giving the little man a little tattoo of a dancing hoolie dancer.
It still hurt though.

them days

Kevin and Jasper, although clueless in the ways of modern machinery, were always trying to help.
Kevin always offered a flat head screwdriver, for it was his chosen helping device. He didn't know what it was for and always called it 'the twisty handle thing'. It helped about once in every fourteen instances.
Jasper never offered help. He would wait, patiently, until asked.

leaf licker

He liked to lick leaves on warm summers eve's.
He might seem simple, but
If you look, squint, at his eyes
you'll see, a sadness there lies
because inside of his head
He lived in suspish of an imagined leaf theif
who would ruin his fun and stamp
and then run and then ....
There was no such man.