Wednesday 8 December 2010

THE YAPPLE WOLLOCK

his name is Burgoise McUeen

Friday 19 November 2010

Monday 15 November 2010

Friday 8 October 2010

this is Remo

"Hello, I'm Remo" said Remo.
Remo has monkeys for hands.He loves monkeys and having them for hands,
although not without it's drawbacks,
is reasonably good fun.
Remo used to be an avid player of pianoforte.
He was never particularly good, not by any means,
but now his opus was just a complete right off.
So on this day, today, Remo was feeling happy,
content ... you might even say Chipper.
He was chipper because today he met someone.
Someones, to be exact.
Remo was at the zoo,
as these days he often was,
but today he was at the monkey cage and he met it's newest dwellee.
There lives there, now, a small chimp called Trebor.
Trebor was a weak and flaccid mammal,
but on the end of each of Trebors arms was a beautiful lady
Called Florence.
Twins.
On the end of a flaccid monkeys arms.


Twins, called Florence.

Remo was overcome with a new kind of feeling.
His monkeys tingled with excitement and he himself tangled with chipper and warm.
Today, the best day all three of them had had in over four years.
Today.
The day,
the night of which, all three of them would die
... at the hands of twins called Florence at the end of a flaccid monkey's arms.

Nap softly, Remo, and farewell.

Friday 17 September 2010

glove head's dog can't ride the bus

Poor Glovehead doesn't know that glovehead dog isn't allowed to ride the bus.

Tuesday 7 September 2010


Now, show me on the life size doll where the other children laughed at you.

Sunday 15 August 2010

king Eliot left


King Eliot's regality was questioned by many on twitter,
King Eliot was above having to explain himself.
So he took his time
and his money
and he left.

Thursday 12 August 2010

Wednesday 14 July 2010

don't sniff any drugs

release day fail


The new communication devices came out today
and as usual, green triangle wasn't up to date with modern conventions.

yellow communication device with red glou
OUTDATED

It had always been like this, it's just that now,
2010,
green triangle thought that the world had moved on,
that the world had become enlightened.
It had ...
... it's just that now it was enlightened by a brownish orangey glou and not a red one.

poor green triangle.
fail again.

Monday 5 July 2010

I SAID

I SAID
I punched a goat.
I punched it in the throat. I punched it then wrote
"I punched a goat"
on the wall near your moat.
on the way home from the moat I saw a stoat, I said
"I punched a goat". I cleared my throat
and then said again to the stoat
"I punched a goat"
the stoat said nothing so I punched it in it's throat
I punched it then wrote
"I punched a stoat" on a nearby boat.
It's probably your boat, now that I think of it, I mean it's moored by your moat so it must be your boat.
Shit, was that your stoat ?
I know it wasn't your goat, because I think someone punched it in the throat. I saw your goat, Derek, and he was fine.
I'm planning to punch that goat again, but I'm building a wooden puncher so I can punch that goat by remote.
Punch it in it's stupid throat.
I hate that goat.

Thursday 10 June 2010

Maria

Maria sat on that old wooden chair.
Faint smile on her pale face.
The sun trickling through the cracked and broken skylight, warming
the stage.
-reciting-
Maria had died on a Tuesday, not long after two fifty two,
She haunted these boards on each Wednesday,
she sat center stage in plain view.
Maria had sung quite badly in life, and in death,
not much had improved
People who lived near the venue, had grown accustomed to it
or had moved.

She sat there on this day, the mid of the week,
She sat and she hummed and the floorboards they creaked
Alone where she sat, just there
center stage,
surrounded by lights, this, her nec-rot-icular cage

She hummed and she smiled and she pleasantly waited
Until evening came and the moon rose and plated
the drapes of the stage with a platinum glow
and the ripples of fake plastic water below

When midnight arrived she stood with closed eyes
she stood and started to melodize
the song she had sung when her life had diminished
she continued on ... but again never finished

When she started to sing a particular tone
the boards and the bars shook and rattled like bone
the chair she up stood on, it rocked and it jiggled
as her tone broke and crimpled
the chair bowed and wiggled
She fell once again
She fell like she had
She fell to her death
Death in death's not so bad.

It doesn't hurt and it doesn't ache
It simply compounds the down turns life takes

It doesn't do much else except stop the show
It serves to remind her what you and I know
That life is a temporal, treasurey thing
That standing on chairs when you can't even sing
is not exactly the best way to go, but better to
pass doing what you love and on show
it was good for Maria to recede life mid flow
and not to grow old and grow bitter.
y'know?.

Wednesday 2 June 2010

NORWAY

Beskytte HusetWhere Blonded Giants Protect your Housens.

Sunday 2 May 2010

don't TRUST seven10

My name is Fillip. I own a small part of grass on the left side of a
cobbledey stone wall here in Beanlandland.
Seven10 owns the grass on the other side of the wall.
We don't talk much, we never have ...
I've never really liked the way he moves.
plus my dog, cartoon, thinks he smells all wrong too.
Today he asked me over to his grass to chat ...I didn't think much of it, maybe he just wanted to end the
distance between us.
Maybe he wonders about my grass sometimes.
So here I am, on his side of the wall here.
It's nice on this side, just different really.
What's that knifey thing behind his back.
Oh, perhaps this is a trap here.
What should I Do, Children ?
.....

Tuesday 27 April 2010

She's got a great personality

... that's what they told him ... He hoped that meant she had
the whole package, but traditionally we know it usually means 'other'.
Balloon head, about to have yet another below par blind date,
took a deep breath ...
As he came around the corner he saw her crossing the road."ah fuc..."
munter.
"... nice balloobies though." He thought.

Sunday 25 April 2010

the dread Hamstropolis

Ted thought he could just walk in and save the princess.
The hamsters had grown stronger and smarter than he had ever
thought possible.
Was this to be his doom ?
Was this the end of Ted Handlemanner ?
One thing though, one thing remained to his advantage ...
He shared a glance, a moment with the green one ...
perhaps his kindness to her when she was his pet years before ...
did she remember him?
was there compassion left in those peepers ?

Monday 19 April 2010

tuesday. twenty to midnight. 7th floor.

Boyce had gone to get some beans more than four hours ago.
As he pushed the door open, Trevin was overcome with the
reality of his fear ... there he lay, his husband and best friend.
Boyce.
Dead.
By the beans.
Beside the beans I mean, not by the beans.
By the beans.
..... the 7th floor had struck again.

Sunday 18 April 2010

teaser monkey


all the little critters loved a smiley faced lolli.
monkey knew this and would hang dangle and tease them.
hang dangle from what seemed to be a nothing place.

Tuesday 16 March 2010

previously that day ...

Mr. beaksley had returned to his nest to find a curious cold egg.Upon further inspection there was an inscription which read
"don't touch this, right.
For if you do you will live forever"
------- followed by some smaller inscripticle writing which he didn't bother reading.
he should have though, as it read thusly ....
"for him such touches this shall be like the stone.
You know, cold an' that."
"Oh, and frozen for all time, like."and furthermore it went on ....
"it's like a curse isn'it."

Monday 15 March 2010

he was a perfect cat

Having now figured out 'butter-based' hoveronomy,
Dennis was now the perfect cat.
THE Mongleganger supreme.
It's a pity that poor little mr. beaksley didn't see it that way.

Saturday 27 February 2010

i'm still here.

see this one? you have to click on it for it to work.

Thursday 28 January 2010

shit up my city PART2 !!!!!

you'll never see cities or horses in the same way again.CONSUME!
it'll be fabulous.

hamstropolis prisoner

by aBowman http://abowman.com/google-modules/